Picture your absolutely favorite food. What does it smell like? What does it look like? What does it taste like? Imagine sitting at your table beautifully set and that perfect food before you. Place one bite in your mouth. Savor it. Experience what it feels like in your mouth. Gently swallow that bite. And sit for a moment, seeing what is left of your severing before you. Enjoy the taste lingering in your mouth. Take a deep breath. Smile at your pleasure. Then take another small bite and enjoy the experience all over again.
So many times we eat whatever is available, and we eat in a rush. While that may deal with an immediate problem of hunger or not having the time to eat, it doesn’t usually serve us. Eating is one of the most important things we do for ourselves and much too frequently, we just don’t pay attention.
In transitioning through the process of grieving, eating challenges often happen. Either we eat mindlessly maybe while sitting in front of the television and eating a whole bag of potato chips or a whole package of cookies. Or maybe we just can’t stand the thought of putting something in our mouths or of entering the kitchen where we used to enjoy preparing meals for our loved one. Whatever our eating challenge may be, now is a good time to pay attention to it.
What is your relationship with food right now? Could it be better? Food is the fuel that serves us to strengthen and heal our bodies, the energy that allows us to survive and take care of ourselves. Eating well is a huge step in recognizing the importance of taking care of our bodies and in turn our souls.
Try an experiment. What food do you keep in your kitchen? Is it healthy food? Is it highly processed? What kinds of foods do you like to eat? Considering all that, make a list of the food you would really like to eat for the next few days. Choose things that are fresh and not processed. If you don’t already have these foods in your kitchen or garden, go shopping. Buy produce that is labeled as local, or better yet, go to a farmer’s market. At this point, only focus on the new few days. Overbuying can be overwhelming both to your budget and your energy.
Plan when you are going to eat the food you have chosen. Waiting till your really hungry causes you to pick up something that is easy and eat to much of it. So plan the times you want to eat that will fit best with your schedule. And if your challenge has been not eating, be sure to eat something at those times you have planned. In either case, eat a reasonable amount. Take time while you are eating to savor your food. And after you have eaten, clean up right away. Dirty dishes in the sink are unappetizing and lead to making poor eating choices to just eat something easy and processed or not eat at all. Plus cleaning up right away is much easier and keeps your home in order which is helpful in the transition process.
Eating consciously is a big step in the grief transformation process. Try it and see what happens. Let me know how it works out for you. I am here to help in your grief transformation process.
Wise words. Good advice for anyone, anytime. But during the grieving process, everything becomes intensified. Thanks for sharing.
You have given excellent information and suggestions.. I had some problems with overeating and binge eating during my lifetime. However, the utter shock I experienced when my husband died suddenly without warning had the opposite effect. I wanted no part of food or of eating. The thought of it, and the actual act of it made me ill. I went along like that for a few weeks, and a dear friend came to stay with me. She quickly understood what I was doing to myself and sat me down for a very serious talk. We worked out a plan where I would eat at least 3 meals per day,, no matter how small,, of healthy, nutritious food I liked. Gradually my appetite returned and I began to eat normal and healthy portions. When my friend returned home, we would speak on the phone each day and i’d Report my meals. As time passed, I did this for myself and worked on taking care of myself in healthy ways as I worked through the grief. Good luck with your book—it’s an awesome way to help others!
Aloha Sherry. What you describe is so common in grieving. Your friend and the plan you developed are perfect examples of ways to transform your grief.