I heard someone say the other day that she was fishing in the wrong pond, and that reminded me of going with my parents to Oregon to visit my aunt and uncle so that my father could go salmon fishing in the ocean with his brother-in-law. I wasn’t allowed to go out on the boat with them, so I would wait on the shore watching the big waves and anticipating having a luscious big fish on the bar-b-q for dinner. They always seemed to go to the perfect spot to fish, and always came back with a bounty.
Being in the right place at the right time leaves room for finding exactly what you want. With fishing, you are more likely to succeed if you go where you know the fish usually hang out instead of to a pond that may be pretty, but you never heard of anyone catching fish there. I think of this in relation to discovering who you want to be around when you are dealing with grief.
Someone told me of a grief group she attended where many tears were shed at every meeting, and I knew that wasn’t the place for me. But it was the right place for those who regularly went to that group. On Maui, I went to a Death Café. The idea intrigued me, and when a friend invited me, I went with her. We met at a Mexican restaurant, ate nachos, and shared our stories. The group was warm and inviting, and the people who attended were working with grief related to a variety of reasons. I made friends there and did return.
A place you can make new friends who are also grieving is the Grief and Happiness Alliance. I facilitate this group which meets every week. We write on a different topic each week, then we talk about what we wrote. And then we learn happiness practices. I love this positive, creative group where I’ve made great new friends. There is no charge for these meetings because we are supported by the Grief and Happiness Nonprofit Organization.
You can come to the meetings by registering here: Grief and Happiness Alliance
Another place you can attend is Dialogue on Death and Dying provided by the Transform Myself Ministry of Unity Church. I am on a panel of four people with different backgrounds who meet once a month to discuss anything related to death and dying. We meet on Zoom and people come to see us by getting a ticket on EventBright. The four of us talk, then we break into smaller groups to have more in depth conversations. Every month the discussion is different, and you can make new friends there too.
You can sign up to attend here: Dialogue on Death and Dying
Ask around in your community to see what is available in person there. You can also find groups for a variety if things where you live on MeetUp. Try something new like a Pickle Ball group or a reading group.
Find MeetUp in your Community: MeetUp
The key is to find the fishing hole that works for you. Having people to talk to is so important, as is just having fun! The key is to do something. You are not going to find that big fish in your living room. Find your own, special fishing pond.
You can join the Grief and Happiness Alliance which meets weekly on Sundays by clicking here.
You can order Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief by clicking here at Amazon:
You can listen to my podcast, Grief and Happiness, by clicking here
You can order the International Best Selling book in 9 countries that I wrote a chapter in, Ignite Forgiveness, by clicking here
