My mom loved to do crossword puzzles, the really big 1,000 piece puzzles. She would spread them out on the dining room table, and we’d be eating off TV trays in the living room. Sometimes I’d sit with her and try to help, but I’ve got to admit, they were somewhat overwhelming. Mom was tenacious […]
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Life is a delicate balance. We breathe in. We breathe out. Our hearts beat. Our hearts relax after each beat. We are awake. We sleep. For every action, there is a counteraction. This balance allows our bodies and hearts to live, to thrive. When a loved one dies, our balance is thrown off. As we […]
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My good friend Reverend Richard Carlini once said, “Become highly responsive to a kindness done.” I hadn’t really thought about kindness from that perspective before. I focus on being kind, but now I’ve realized the importance of receiving as well as giving. Think about the last time someone did something kind for you. Maybe a […]
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When you always speak only positive words, you will be happy! I realize that is a bold statement, yet it is true, and it was a hard lesson for me to learn. You may say “I am always positive,” but are you really? Here is an example. Compare “I don’t like to eat liver” to […]
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Most grievers experience signs that remind them of their loved ones. A sign can come from a sweet memory, a fragrance, a favorite song, a remembered idiosyncrasy, or unique experience. I frequently see, hear, or feel what seems to be signs from my loved ones who have died. On a beautiful day in Maui, my […]
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I remember a quote I learned while studying literature at the university by Scottish poet Robert Burns: “The best said plans of mice and men /Gang aft a-gley. Translated, that is “Often go awry.” In the case of people dealing with the death of a loved one, that could be changed to “Always go awry.” […]
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Monday I was scheduled to take a flight to a neighboring island. I arrived at the airport at noon, and I arrived at my destination at 8 PM. The actual flight took 25 minutes. While we did board the jet on time, that’s where the waiting started. Most of my day was spent waiting. In […]
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Often when I talk to people who are dealing with loss, they tell me that their sense of purpose is no longer clear to them. Everything in their lives seems different and they find themselves examining what they should do next. I know I did. I had spent all my time with my husband before […]
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I heard someone say the other day that she was fishing in the wrong pond, and that reminded me of going with my parents to Oregon to visit my aunt and uncle so that my father could go salmon fishing in the ocean with his brother-in-law. I wasn’t allowed to go out on the boat […]
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